no cravings…well, one

I’m doing great today.  I woke up and said, “I won’t drink today.”  I reminded myself of that a few times.  I made sure to have a granola bar before a meeting because I didn’t know how long it would go.  Throughout the day, right as I was about to hit an intense stretch of attention, something would remind me to refill my water bottle or have a couple of almonds.

Then, one of my colleagues started talking about how she’s been drinking wine at night to get sleepy.  Then she joked that she was drinking too much, talked about a bottle of cabernet she had at home…and I started picturing her drinking then I pictured me drinking.  Then I thought, “I should drink wine tonight too.”  Then I just had to cut that shit out.  I played the tape and pictured myself waking up late, groggy and rushing to work.  I just don’t want to deal with that.

I’m super tired.  Off to bed, I haven’t had one of my wild scary dreams for about a week now.  Last night I dreamt that I was getting my nails done with red sparkle polish – maybe it’s time for a manicure.

random dream on day 2

Oh, I also meant to write a little something about the insanely wierd dream I had last night.  Technically it was on day 1 but I think it was meant for reflection on day 2.

To give the short version, my sister was getting married to her husband who she’s been married to for 12 years.  I kept asking why they were getting married again but everyone was acting like it was the first time.  We were at a huge reception and there was booze everywhere.  I didn’t drink in the dream but I did tell my sister I would drink for her wedding and just start again tomorrow.

The other part of the dream was that I was eating this really good chocolate and I started to taste something wrong with it.  I spit it out and it was full of peanuts which were not in it when I ate it.  In real life, I’m allergic to peanuts!  Everyone was asking me if I would be okay and I said, “I only ate one.  I think I’ll be fine.”

Connections???  I think so!